Your Subconscious CEO: How Mental Equivalents Create Your Reality

THE PULSE

This is what matters this week.

You don't get what you want.
You get what your system is calibrated to receive.

That calibration is called a mental equivalent.

A mental equivalent is the inner prototype of your outer reality. It's the subconscious standard your nervous system and energy field hold for what's possible, permissible, and expected in your life.

It's not just what you think—it's what you believe, embody, and normalize at a core level.

Here’s the solid truth though: 
Whatever you consistently hold as true within, your reality will echo back without exception.

Mental equivalents aren't necessarily thoughts you consciously choose. They're what you hold in your subconscious about who you are, what you're capable of, and what's possible for you.

They're your belief system about your life, your present, and your future—encoded in your nervous system, your emotional reflexes, and your energetic frequency.

This is why wanting something isn't enough to create it.

You can say you want love while holding the mental equivalent that you're not worthy of it.

You can declare you want financial freedom while believing that money doesn't come to people like you.

You can desire a thriving business while unconsciously expecting that success means sacrifice.

Whatever mental equivalent you're actually holding—not the one you think you should have, but the one your nervous system recognizes as true—that's what gets demonstrated in your life.

This is the real reason why affirmations feel hollow and vision boards gather dust. You're trying to manifest from your conscious desires while broadcasting from your subconscious limitations.

As we want to create something new, something better, something more expansive for our lives, we have to hold the mental equivalent of what we want with faithful belief that it's possible, that it's already on its way to us.

Because your mental equivalent isn't just influencing your reality—it is creating your reality, thought by thought, belief by belief, expectation by expectation.

The question isn't whether this law is working.
The question is: What are you using it to create?

THE DEEP TAKE

Where we go deeper—science, story, truth.

For years, I carried the mental equivalent of "I have to do everything myself."

I didn't consciously choose this belief. It was wired into my nervous system through childhood trauma—the deep somatic knowing that people weren't safe, that trust was dangerous, that if I didn't control everything, everything would fall apart.

This particular mental equivalent showed up as:
• Chronic insomnia and a hypervigilant nervous system
• Inability to rest without guilt
• Micromanaging every detail of my work and family
• Team members feeling undervalued and frustrated
• My husband watching me burn out while feeling helpless to intervene

Even when people could see what was happening and tried to talk to me about it,
I would argue: "You don't understand. I'm the only one who can do this. This is my creation. People are counting on me, not my team, not someone else. It has to be me."

Because that's what I believed. At the cellular level.

Our brains are prediction machines, constantly scanning for threats based on past experiences. When trauma teaches you that people are unsafe, your nervous system creates protective patterns that feel like safety—even when they're actually suffocation.

And those protective patterns don't just shape your internal experience—they broadcast an energetic frequency that creates the very circumstances you're trying to avoid.

My mental equivalent of "I have to do everything myself" attracted exactly that—a reality where I indeed had to do everything myself, because my inability to trust prevented others from truly stepping into their power.

For me, the external reflection was a successful medical practice that felt like a beautiful prison. And ultimately, a burnout so severe it included deep depression and walking away from everything I'd built.

Ancient wisdom traditions have understood this law for millennia.
Jesus of Nazareth said, "It is done unto you as you believe." 
Hindu scriptures speak of how mental impressions create karma.
Hermetic philosophy declares "As above, so below." 
Every spiritual tradition, from Christianity to Taoism, has known what neuroscience
now proves: consciousness creates reality.

This law of mental equivalents operates on your beliefs just like gravity operates on physical objects. Gravity doesn't care if you understand it or believe in it—it works automatically. Drop something, it falls—every time.

Your beliefs work the same way. They create your reality automatically 24/7, whether you're conscious of them or not.

You can't change gravity, but you can change where you position objects within it.
In the same way, you can't change how the law of mental equivalents works—but you can change what beliefs you hold within it.

When your mental equivalent shifts from "I'm not good enough" to "I am worthy," your reality reorganizes around this new belief.

But you have to believe it.

My breakthrough came when I realized that healing my trauma wasn't about fixing the past—it was about expanding my consciousness to know the truth of who I really am as a Divine being, the part of me that doesn’t change.

From that expanded understanding, I could hold an entirely new mental equivalent about myself and what I'm capable of creating.

But I had to start right where I was.
Not where I wished I was, not where I "should" be, but in the messy reality of mistrust and control.

Starting from any place other than right where you are doesn't work.
It's not scientific, it's not reality, and it's the fastest way to stay exactly where you are.

Little by little, I began to unfold my consciousness through greater and greater mental equivalents. From "I have to do everything myself" to "I am supported by Life itself." From "People will let me down" to "The right people show up when I create space for them."

This wasn't positive thinking. This was remembering the truth of who I really am—not a trauma-driven controller, but a woman capable of trust, delegation, and ease.

This is the law of mental equivalents in action: As within, so without.

This is how your life becomes the perfect reflection of your deepest beliefs about what's possible for you.

IN REAL LIFE

What it actually looks like.

Shifting mental equivalents doesn’t require you to think harder—it just requires you
to think differently.

Here's how to begin:

▶ Identify your mental equivalents—both visible and hidden.
Your life is always showing you what you truly believe. The patterns you keep experiencing—in relationships, work, health, money—aren't random. They're demonstrations of your subconscious programming.

Start with what's obvious: Identify three areas where you keep repeating the same struggles. Then ask this: What would I have to believe about myself, life, or my worthiness for this pattern to make perfect sense?

Then examine what's hidden. The most powerful mental equivalents masquerade as "just being realistic" or "that's just how life is." Notice what you automatically assume is impossible for you.

What dreams do you dismiss before they're even fully formed? What do you tell yourself is "just not for people like me"?

Both the obvious patterns and the dismissed dreams reveal your mental equivalents.

▶ Use neuroplasticity to retrain your subconscious.
Mental equivalents aren't just mental—they're embodied in your nervous system. Your brain remains malleable throughout your entire life, and repetition plus emotion equals new neural pathways.

Do this:
Choose one limiting mental equivalent to transform. Instead of just creating an opposite affirmation, ask: What would a woman who naturally embodies this new belief think, feel, and do differently?

Then practice being her. Daily. In small, measurable ways.

When you notice yourself reverting to old patterns, pause and breathe.
Ask your body: What are you afraid will happen if I don't operate this way? 
Listen to the answer.

Then offer your nervous system evidence that the new way is safe. Affirm the truth.

One way to do this easily is EFT.

▶ EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique).
This method combines gentle tapping on acupressure points while addressing limiting beliefs. Research shows it reduces cortisol, calms the fear center in the brain, and creates new neural pathways; it’s legit.

Learn the basics here or explore comprehensive resources at The Tapping Solution.

▶ Expect the external world to test your new belief.
As you shift internally, your outer world will present situations designed to confirm whether your new mental equivalent is actually integrated or just performed.

When challenges arise, instead of seeing them as proof that change is impossible, recognize them as opportunities to strengthen your new neural pathways.

Each time you respond from your new mental equivalent instead of your old pattern, you're literally rewiring your brain and broadcasting a new frequency.

FROM THE WELL

What’s supporting the rhythm.

This week, two anchors for the woman expanding into new mental equivalents.

→ Power & Purpose: 5 Pillars Every Woman Must Have to Create a Life of Authenticity, Freedom & Joy by Dr. Erin Martin
This is my published book written for the high-achieving woman ready to step into her own authority. The five pillars—Desire, Voice, Self-Love, Tribe, and Superpowers—help you dismantle limitation and rebuild from sovereignty.
For the Lavish Well community: eBook now $4.29 (regular $9.99). Get your copy here (Paperback edition also available on Amazon here).

→ The Untethered Soul by Michael A. Singer
A NYT Best-Seller, this is essential reading for understanding the voice in your head versus your true Self—a perfect companion for mental equivalent transformation. There’s a reason Oprah calls it one of her favorite books of all time, it’s one of mine as well. Find it here.

*This section may contain affiliate links that support this publication. However, I only recommend products that I believe in and know to be of the highest quality.

THE LAST WORD

Your mental equivalent is your most powerful creative tool—and your greatest responsibility.

Every thought you think repeatedly becomes a neural pathway. Every emotion you feel consistently becomes an energetic frequency. Every belief you hold subconsciously becomes a magnetic force in your life.

You are not just changing thoughts—you are exercising your divine creative power. Every mental equivalent is an act of spiritual creation, a declaration of what you believe is possible as a spiritual being having a human experience.

When you understand that your thoughts are creative forces—not just positive thinking, but actual creative power—everything changes.

You stop being casual about what you think and how you let your thoughts run free.
You take radical responsibility for your internal environment.

The ancient truth remains: It is done unto you as you believe. Not as you hope. Not as you work for. As you believe—in every cell, every breath, every unconscious moment.

Life is always listening. You are always telling it what to create. 
It’s time to create with intention and true power.

That's the shift.
That's the medicine.

The Invitation

If you're a high-achieving woman ready to discover and transform the mental equivalents that have been running your life from the shadows—to become the architect of your own reality and step into unshakable confidence and aligned leadership—Veritas is where we do this work together.

This high-level group program is an exclusive four-phase mastery experience for elite women who refuse to play small and are done with indecision, self-doubt, and second-guessing, and are ready for a life of sovereign leadership, unshakable confidence, and aligned action. You'll eliminate the mental equivalents keeping you stuck and create new ones that align with your highest vision—moving with absolute clarity in every decision and transition ahead.

This program is available only twice a year. Enrollment is by application only.
Join the waitlist now for first access to this intimate, transformational experience.

Until next week…

Be well. Be fierce. Be lavish.